How to Glow Up Post Breakup

Why let a breakup break you when it can make you? Unpacking your feelings and reflections post-split might just reveal that you've been handed a blank slate. This is your chance to redesign your life in a way that centers you. It's not about "getting back" at someone; it's about getting back to you, but better.

    The Psychology of the Breakup Glow Up

    Let's be honest: As much as a glow-up centers around self-improvement, there's also that sweet satisfaction in knowing your ex will see just how well you're doing without them.

    Maybe they'll regret their decision or maybe they won't, but that's beside the point. While it's natural to want to "show them what they're missing," the true victory lies in realizing that you are doing better without them—and not just as a performance, but in deep, meaningful ways that contribute to your well-being.

    The breakup is a cognitive reset.

    Sure, it hurts, but it also catapults you into a state of hyper-awareness about your needs, desires, and self-worth.

    You're not just upgrading your life for the optics; you're doing it because you're discovering a more authentic version of yourself. The energy you once put into the relationship? Now it's all yours to invest back into yourself.

    So yes, let them see you shine, but do it for you. The real glow-up is internal and it's about becoming the person you're proud to be, with or without an audience.

    7 Steps to Your Glow Up Post Breakup

    Step 1: Understand Your Emotional Landscape

    You've just gone through a breakup, and your emotions are swirling like autumn leaves in the wind. Don't just let them drift away—pin them down. Think of it like this: If you were on a road trip, you wouldn't just drive aimlessly; you'd use a GPS.

    The same principle applies to your emotional state. Whether you choose to jot these feelings down in a journal or simply tag them mentally, acknowledging what you're going through provides a roadmap for your healing journey.

    Why does identifying your emotions matter? Because it's the first step to knowing what exactly needs healing. Are you sad, angry, or even experiencing moments of unexpected joy? Each emotional state serves as a clue, pointing you toward what needs your focus right now. By paying attention to your emotional shifts, you're essentially fine-tuning your internal diagnostic tool.

    You’re not just feeling; you’re understanding what each feeling means for your larger healing process. This awareness serves as your emotional GPS, ensuring you're on the right path to the healing you truly need.

    Step 2: Reclaim Your Time and Space

    In a relationship, personal time can sometimes feel like a luxury rather than a given. Now that you're riding solo, all those pockets of time are back in your court.

    Instead of sinking into the void of Netflix binges or social media scrolling—tempting, I know—how about investing that time in stuff you've always wanted to do? Maybe it's that photography course you eyed last year, or perhaps you've always wanted to learn how to cook more than just instant noodles.

    Whatever it is, now is your golden window to dive in. And the best part? Engaging in these activities doesn't just act as a distraction from any lingering heartache; it's a pathway to reconnect with the unique parts of yourself that got shelved during coupledom.

    And let’s talk about your personal space—the literal one. If your living quarters have memories lingering around like unwanted guests, it's time for a shake-up. Always hated that wall color? Paint it. Despised the furniture layout? Rearrange it.

    The goal is to create an environment that's a true reflection of you, not a compromise between you and someone else. This is more than just a superficial makeover; it’s an assertion of your individuality. Whether it's hanging up art that speaks to you or finally getting that funky coffee table you've been eyeing, tweaking your space doesn't just give you a new backdrop for Instagram selfies; it reinforces the reclaiming of your individual self.

    Step 3: Set Achievable Goals

    So you're fired up and ready to glow up—amazing. But let's make that enthusiasm actionable. Start with the specifics. If fitness is your jam right now, don’t just say, "I want to get fit." Instead, outline the nitty-gritty.

    Are you getting a gym membership or subscribing to a killer home workout app? What’s the meal plan looking like? Keto, vegan, balanced diet? And let's not forget about tracking your progress—will you be using a fitness tracker or old-school journaling?

    Same goes for career growth. Wanting a better job or a promotion is great, but how are you getting there? Will you take online courses, network more, or maybe sharpen your resume and LinkedIn profile? Goals aren’t just wishful thinking; they're your roadmap. And just like any good roadmap, the more detailed it is, the less chance you'll take a wrong turn.

    But here’s the real kicker—these goals do more than give you a to-do list. They give you purpose that extends beyond the initial emotional chaos of the breakup. When the going gets tough or you're losing steam, these goals act as your North Star, guiding you towards the life you not just want, but truly deserve.

    Step 4: Commit to Physical Transformation

    You can't underestimate the power of a good old-fashioned physical transformation. It's not about impressing others; it's about surprising yourself. Whether you decide to sweat it out at the gym, rock a daring new haircut, or update your wardrobe, these changes often act as external markers for internal shifts. They're like a mirror reflecting not just a new look, but a whole new you.

    But here's the catch: these physical changes do more than make you look good; they make you feel good. When you see that toned body in the mirror or feel the swish of your new haircut, there’s a jolt of confidence that comes along with it.

    This isn’t just vanity; it’s a manifestation of your hard work and commitment to self-improvement. So, while inner healing is the cornerstone of any meaningful glow-up, don’t discount the transformative power of the physical changes you're embracing.

    Step 5: Work on Inner Healing

    So, you've committed to the physical aspects of your transformation—awesome. But let's not ignore the parts of you that can't be seen in a mirror. These are the scars you carry on the inside, and they deserve just as much attention as anything else.

    Maybe you're already into meditation, or perhaps you've been thinking about starting. Either way, taking time each day to tune inward helps you become more resilient and self-aware. Think of meditation, or any spiritual practice you resonate with, as your internal gym. Just as you're toning your muscles, these practices tone your emotional and mental well-being.

    But why bother with inner healing when you're already on the road to looking fabulous? Simple. Because a glow-up that’s only skin deep is like building a house on a shaky foundation—it won't stand the test of time. Inner healing, whether it's through spiritual practices or even therapy, ensures that your glow-up isn't just for show; it’s rooted in real emotional robustness.

    Picture this: You're not just turning heads as you walk by; you're also carrying a newfound sense of self-assurance that no one can shake. So, when we talk about a glow-up post-breakup, it's not just about the aesthetics; it’s also about you walking into a room and owning it, from the inside out.

    Step 6: Cultivate New Relationships

    Breaking up isn't just an end; it's a beginning, too—a chance to reassess not just your romantic entanglements but your broader social landscape. You might find that the relationship you've left behind isn't the only one you've outgrown.

    As you evolve, it only makes sense that your circle does too. Now's the time to lean into relationships that resonate with the new you, the better you. This could mean forming new friendships or deepening existing ones that genuinely enrich your life.

    But why the focus on friendships during a personal glow-up? Well, the right friends don't just bring laughter and good times; they provide emotional sustenance and can be catalysts in achieving your life goals. Maybe they introduce you to networking opportunities or become your gym buddies, thereby helping you stick to that fitness routine.

    friendships aren't just a nice-to-have; they're essential in building a support system that aligns with your ambitions and emotional needs. When you choose to surround yourself with the right people, you're not just socializing; you're strategically enriching your life.

    Step 7: Assess, Adjust, and Keep Going

    If you're expecting a straight shot to your ultimate glow-up, you might be in for a surprise. The journey is often more like a winding road with a few potholes along the way. Some days, you'll wake up feeling like you’ve slipped back a few steps.

    And you know what? That’s entirely okay.

    The key isn’t to beat yourself up about it but to do a little detective work. Ask yourself what triggered this detour. Was it a bad day at work, an emotional hiccup, or maybe a skipped gym session that threw you off?

    Once you understand what caused your setback, you can adjust your sails. Maybe it's changing your workout time because evenings make you feel sluggish, or perhaps it's adding some self-care to better cope with stress.

    Remember, progress is still progress, even if it feels agonizingly slow. The trick is to not let setbacks stall you but to use them as opportunities for fine-tuning your approach. In that sense, every stumble becomes a stepping stone, bringing you closer to the you that you're aiming to become.

    How to Glow Up and Not Give a F***

    If you're all-in on this glow-up journey and you're thinking, "I need more than just an article," say hello to our go-to journal: "How to Glow Up and Not Give a F***." This isn't just a blank notebook waiting for your scribbles; it's your wingman for digging deep and really getting to the root of things. Designed with powerful shadow work prompts, this journal helps you unlock the doors to your subconscious mind.

    So if you've got emotional baggage or old thought patterns that are holding you back, this journal offers you a clear pathway to tackle them head-on. It's not just about looking better; it's about changing the way you interact with yourself and the world, all while keeping it real and authentic.

    Suss it out

    Final Thoughts

    We've all heard the saying, "When one door closes, another opens," and breakups are a perfect example. Sure, they're tough, but they also offer an incredible opportunity for growth, transformation, and yes—a killer glow-up.

    From understanding the psychology behind why you're perfectly primed for a glow-up right now to giving you a step-by-step guide on how to do it, you're equipped with everything you need to turn this challenging time into a rebirth. And if you're itching to dive deeper, our How to Glow Up and Not Give a F*** journal is your ideal co-pilot. So what are you waiting for? Your new and improved life is just a glow-up away.

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    Author Bio

    I wanted to share the lessons I've learnt in a cool place and write in a way that appeals to all generations. I cover all things neuroscience, psychology and spirituality with a special interest in pop culture trends.