Ghosting Everyone & Focusing on Myself: A Glow Up Guide

You've probably heard the saying, "sometimes, you need to disconnect to reconnect." Well, how about taking it up a notch? Imagine going a 'ghost' to the world as you know it, focusing on personal growth and re-emerging with a mental and physical glow up. This TikTok trend has seen creators making a come back and sharing tips on what they did to glow up. We're about to show you a guide.

    The First Stage of the Ultimate Glow-Up

    In the fast-paced world that we live in, life can sometimes feel like a never-ending carousel of engagements, commitments, and responsibilities. We end up so entangled in this external whirlwind that we lose touch with our inner selves. The whirlwind might seem necessary, but it's crucial to remember: all the answers you're looking for, all the growth you're seeking, is within you.

    But how do we find the time to reconnect with ourselves amid this chaos? It's simpler than you might think. You don't have to go ghost from EVERYONE, but you do need to get rid of distractions, negative influences and begin to focus inwardly to begin a transformative journey towards self-discovery.

    How to Ghost Everyone & Focus on Myself

    Step 1: Disconnecting: The Act of Ghosting Everyone

    Now, don't get me wrong, we're not promoting the idea of becoming hermits or abandoning our loved ones. Ghosting in this context simply means intentionally creating a space for yourself, away from external influences and constant stimulation. You're not severing ties or burning bridges, but temporarily muting the world to dial up the volume on your inner voice. It's a deliberate act of self-love, a silent statement that proclaims, "I matter. I need to attend to myself."

    Before you begin, it's essential to communicate your intentions clearly with your close circle. Let them know that you're embarking on a journey of self-discovery and might be less available for a while. This transparency can prevent misunderstandings and reassure them that your temporary distance is not personal.

    This first step is about prioritizing your wellbeing and growth by intentionally creating a personal space devoid of distractions. Here's how:

    1. Define your boundaries: Decide the extent to which you wish to limit your engagement with the world.
    2. Communication is key: Inform your loved ones about your intention to take some time for self-discovery. Clarify that this is a temporary phase and not a personal rejection.
    3. Respect your decision: Once you've committed to this journey, honor your decision. It might be tempting to return to your old patterns, but remember why you started in the first place.

    Step 2: Embrace the Law of Detachment

    It's time to tap into the wisdom of the Law of Detachment, which is about releasing your need to control outcomes and embracing uncertainty as a path to freedom. It's about shifting focus from what you want to achieve (the outcome) to who you are becoming in the process (the journey). Here, the goal isn't to create a specific version of yourself, but to create an environment where you can grow, change, and evolve freely. As you disengage from the external world, allow yourself to detach from expectations - yours and others'.

    The Law of Detachment is the wisdom of surrendering control over outcomes, embracing the journey instead. It encourages freedom, growth, and discovery. Steps to embracing this law include:

    1. Release expectations: Shed the burden of outcomes, goals, and milestones.
    2. Welcome uncertainty: Learn to see the unknown not as a threat but an opportunity for growth and learning.
    3. Focus on the journey: Shift your attention from the end result to the process. Celebrate your evolution, however incremental it might seem.

    Step 3: A Daily Dose of Self-Care

    Remember, this journey is about nourishing your mind, body, and spirit. Start by incorporating regular exercise into your daily routine. Physical activity not only enhances your body's wellbeing but also helps clear your mind, improving focus and mood. Next, establish a nutritious diet that feeds your body with the right fuel.

    A strong body fosters a strong mind. To truly glow, you need to take care of both. Here's your daily checklist:

    1. Regular Exercise: Incorporate a form of physical activity that you enjoy. It could be running, yoga, dancing, or even a brisk walk.
    2. Balanced Diet: Feed your body with nutritious food. Opt for whole grains, fresh fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and lots of water.
    3. Adequate Rest: Ensure you're getting enough sleep. Establish a regular sleep schedule and create a peaceful sleep environment.

    Step 4: Mindful Practices – Meditation and Shadow Work Journaling

    Meditation is a powerful tool for introspection. It encourages mindfulness, improves concentration, and reduces stress. Start with just a few minutes a day, gradually increasing as you get more comfortable. Guided meditations can be particularly useful for beginners.

    As you meditate, you may start uncovering aspects of yourself that you've suppressed or ignored - your 'shadow self.' Shadow work journaling involves recognizing, understanding, and accepting these parts. Write about your thoughts, fears, insecurities - anything that arises during meditation. Don't judge or censor, just observe and accept. This process can be intense but is integral to self-discovery and healing.

    Meditation and journaling form the backbone of your introspective journey. Here's how to make the most of them:

    1. Regular Meditation: Start small, maybe 5 minutes a day, and gradually increase your meditation time. Use guided meditations or mindfulness apps if you find it hard to focus initially.
    2. Shadow Work Journaling: Whenever you confront a part of your 'shadow self' during meditation, note it down. Write your thoughts, feelings, fears, and even dreams. This unfiltered expression is therapeutic and revelatory.

    Step 5: Feed Your Mind – Read, Learn, Grow

    Engage with material that broadens your perspective and challenges your assumptions. This could be anything from a thought-provoking book, a documentary, or even a podcast. Learning new things stimulates the mind and fosters a sense of achievement and growth.

    In order to grow, you need to constantly learn. Here are a few ways to do that:

    1. Read Books: Choose books that challenge your thinking, open your mind, and inspire you.
    2. Watch Documentaries: Pick subjects that interest you and can contribute to your growth.
    3. Listen to Podcasts: Great for multitaskers. You can learn while you commute, cook, or during any downtime.

    Step 6: Reemerging with a Glow

    Once you feel more attuned to your inner self, you can gradually reintegrate into your social circles. However, strive to maintain the balance between your external engagements and your newly discovered inner peace. Once you feel more in tune with your inner self, it's time to reintegrate with your external world, but with newly defined boundaries:

    1. Gradual Reintegration: Don't rush to resume your old lifestyle. Take small steps to reestablish your social interactions.
    2. Maintain Balance: Continue your self-care routines and ensure that your engagements do not disrupt your newfound inner peace.
    3. Carry Your Glow: Remember, your transformation is not just physical, but also mental and spiritual. Carry this inner glow with confidence and grace.

    Remember, this 'glow-up' isn't about a drastic, outward transformation, but a subtle, inward one. You'll reemerge with a deeper understanding of yourself, a stronger sense of identity, and a radiant inner glow that's far more compelling than any physical makeover.

    How to Glow Up

    If you're looking to heal old trauma, patterns and behavior our self therapy journal How to Glow Up and Not Give A F*** can help. It is a guide thatgoes beyond just words. It provides practical exercises for self-reflection and self-improvement, encouraging mindfulness and gratitude practices. It's a tool that helps you navigate your feelings, deal with negative emotions, and embrace your unique self.

    Learn more

    Final Thoughts

    The process of 'Ghosting Everyone and Focusing on Myself' is not a one-time event but an ongoing journey of self-love and discovery.

    It allows us to become the best version of ourselves, not by chasing an ideal, but by understanding and accepting who we truly are. It's about being patient, being kind, and most importantly, being true to yourself.

    After all, the most important relationship you will ever have is with yourself - make it a good one.

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    Author Bio

    Just a journalist who fell into spiritual practice by accident. I wanted to share the lessons I've learnt in a cool place and write in a way that appeals to all generations. I cover all things spirituality with a special interest in pop culture trends.